10 HOT TIPS TO INVEST IN THE BEST VERSION OF YOURSELF FOR YOUR RELATIONSHIP

Have you seen that smart fridge where you don’t need to open the door to see what’s inside and it also communicates with Woollies if there’s something missing? I so need that! Is it more like I want it? In this crazy first world, it seems we absolutely need the latest groovy gadgets. Many are striving to keep up with Instagram worthy exotic holidays, eating way too much yet drowning in guilt for being too exhausted to get to gym. Are you working like crazy to haul in the required cash for this enviable lifestyle and ruminating over all the things you’re not?
 
We also can’t enjoy dynamic and flourishing relationships if you’re the withdrawn shadow of your former exuberant self. When you can’t contribute to your intimate partner, family and friends because you’re so exhausted, sad, depressed or full of self-loathing, many of your interactions won’t end so well.
 
Enjoy my top 10 tips to ensure you’re investing in your “Best Version of Yourself” for great relationships:

1. The comfort of your discomfort: Your whirring toxic thoughts of “can’t” and “not good enough” will continue to hold you in a vice like grip if you allow your brain to be stuck in the comfort of your discomfort. It sure is a cosy familiar place but only you control your thoughts which lead your mind and body.
2. Start with a breath and a bang: Up to eight minutes of mindful breathing or prayer nourishes your neural pathways and reinforces coherence in the heart, setting you up for success with clarity. Back this up with a list of the three most important things to do today that will have the largest impact. Bang!
3. See an Overwhelmologist: Who’s that? Mentors that tell you how they did it. They can break down where you want to be into bite size pieces to help you get there. It could be someone working in our dream industry, another parent at school you admire, a successful Uncle or a Counsellor ala moi!
4. Watch a thought leader online each week: For those who don’t like reading, you’ve got inspiration from reputable gurus on Youtube on your smart phone any day of the week on any topic such as relationships, real estate and finance!
5. Exercise: Edorphins, enhanced corticol blood flow, feel amazing - just do it.
6. Self-compassion: I’m thinking golf days, horse riding weekends, day spas, silent retreats, flotation tanks, brewery tours, a fluffy, bubbly bath at home or a book under a tree. Like me, I’m sure your to do list is endless and it’s important to not do as well. I even block gap time out on the calendar.
7. Be grateful: Write down three things each morning and three things each night. Include the best aspects of yourself you already feature instead of getting to stuck in what you’re not. Stick them in a jar and enjoy reading your time capsule which will include those days when you struggled to find one thing!
8. Build a “feel good” tribe: Surround yourself with inspirational people. Un-friend those who consistently leave you feeling like a lesser version of yourself.
9. Stop looking for shortcuts: Sorry to break it to you but those abs really won’t reveal themselves with a pill, your glowing skin won’t shine for eating hot pies and sauce and your dream job won’t be offered whilst Netflixing.
10. Experiment and learn a new thing each week: Fear will sure keep the lid on your wildly successful and wonderful ideas. Think like a scientist who relentlessly experiments, searches, tests and tracks their progress. When in doubt, bias toward experiment and action.

Joanne Wilson is the weekly columnist for the Sunshine Coast Daily Weekend magazine, weekly radio guest, professional relationship counsellor and certified neuropsychotherapy practitioner of TheConfidante Counselling. She is based on the Sunshine Coast, Queensland - Australia. You can contact her at: www.theconfidantecounselling.com or email HERE.
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